Wednesday, March 11, 2009

How I'm Weird, Part Two Trillion (Really, Couldn't This Be the Title of EVERY Post?)

Personality quirk that I like least about myself:

I HATE talking about personal situations with co-workers, especially bosses. So much so that I end up sounding weird and feel like I sound like I'm lying. I hope I really don't sound like I'm lying, but I suspect I do. I tend to just blurt out whatever is going on, offer little to no detail, practically cut off the other person if they try to say something comforting or nice (not intentionally), and lead with the fact that I need time off or whatever other work-related piece of the information that I can scrounge up. The ONLY time I have ever felt genuine when I was telling a supervisor about something bad happening to me was the day I found out my grandmother had passed away. I sent my supervisor an email letting her know what had happened, she called right away, and as soon as I picked up the phone, I started sobbing. Not graceful or dignified, but genuine. Oh, and when I broke my ankle, I called my supervisor and said, "I have a funny story to tell you that's not really funny at all." But that supervisor was a close friend (still is, actually). So that one doesn't really count.

So tell me - how do you tell bad news about yourself or your life to your boss? Is there a graceful way to do it?

10 comments:

Unknown said...

Hmmm, that's tough! Especially when you have to ask for time off to get some sort of gyno appointment and your boss is a guy who doesn't really think that women should be out of the kitchen. Oh wait, that was just me.

Shelly said...

Hyphen - he sounds DELIGHTFUL! *snort* I had one that was sorta like that, but he's gone.

Fiona Picklebottom said...

I had that problem too, when I had an office job. I ALWAYS felt like I was lying or trying to get out of doing something work-related, when really it was only SOMETIMES.

Shelly said...

Fiona - I think that's how it started for me. When I was right out of college, I would call in sick when I was really hungover, so I was totally lying. I think I figure that people will still think I'm doing that.

Pickles and Dimes said...

I hate doing this too. Especially with funerals, because even the idea of a funeral makes me sad, so when bosses start asking questions, I start to cry, even if I don't really feel that sad about the person dying.

Alice said...

this is why it is SUPER AWESOME to work for a friend. it's actually ok to call her in the morning and say "omg, dude, you would not believe the hangover i have. i'm going to be working from HOME today, if that's cool." (my boss: "oh, totally. but tell me about last night!!!")

Shelly said...

Shauna - I have the opposite problem. I really don't cry at work. So even if I'm sad about the person dying, unless I just found out, I'm usually pretty calm. Then I feel like a cyborg or like I'm totally heartless because I'm NOT crying all over the place. Which makes me think I look dishonest, because if I was telling the truth, I'd be upset, right? (Why yes, I can overthink most anything, how did you guess?)

Shelly said...

Alice - COULD NOT BE MORE JEALOUS! That is awesome.

Sarah said...

I don't have a BOSS, but I get weird telling any bad news to ANYONE. I totally sympathize with you on the miscarriage thing, as I've had two, at seven and eight weeks along, and both times I had TOLD EVERYONE already. And it's hard to know how to act- incredibly grieved, or trying to keep a stiff upper lip and just say something like, "Yeah, it's sad. At least it was early on though." And half the time I didn't even know how I felt about it, and it was just so AWKWARD telling people, "Oh by the way, I'm not pregnant anymore." Sucks.

Shelly said...

Des - EXACTLY!!! And how I felt about it changed (more than) daily at first, so I was never really sure what to say. Nothing felt truly genuine.